Make way!
Take the stairs!
Cops! Let's go!
This way!
Over there!
Hey! That's my car!
Damn! Dead end! Back up!
That way!
What now?
We'll take a chance!
Hold on!
Split up!
Ricky! Over there!
Where's your ticket?
Don't worry, they won't find us.
No, you don't!
Please take a picture for us.
Thank you.
One more!
I'll take one for you.
Thank you.
Ricky!
You're really something.
The pictures, boss.
Joining our club is good for you.
That cop is dead if he comes any closer.
Get the phone!
Your phone is ringing round the clock.
Because I take calls from undercover agents around the world.
Hello, hello?
Oui, oui?
Try the Bulgarian line.
Maha, maha?
Answer it yourself!
Ola, ola?
Madali, madali?
It's from Japan.
Mushi, mushi
It's Muscles, sir.
We found him.
He finally showed up.
Bring him back!
There's a slight hitch.
They took Ricky.
I'll send another agent to help you.
No, they know
who we are.
What then?
Get Fastbuck, my buddy from the orphanage.
Fastbuck?
We should unload
the goods, Boss.
What's the profit margin?
32 times more than market price.
Fine! Get rid of it.
Boss, Dicky and Lin are fighting again.
What about?
Brigitte Lin.
Let me see.
Let them take turns
to pin it up
Boss, I have Maggie Cheung.
Is it clean?
Yes! It was used to wrap chicken wings.
Good! I'll take that!
Get back to work!
Sir!
Summon the convicts from cell No. 3
Yes, sir!
7181!
5734!
6377!
Come here!
Sir!
Here they are, sir!
Fine! Get 1663!
Yes, sir!
Get back to work!
Yes, sir!
1663! Come here!
Sir!
We're letting you go, 1663
Sir, are you serious?
Are you kidding me?
Even counting
public holidays and weekends,
I should be here till Mid-autumn Festival.
You're paroled on good behavior.
You may go!
Really?
I don't make jokes.
I'd like to collect my things.
My watch, ring, and a lighter.
Forget it! Here's $500
to compensate your loss.
Leave now!
Can I say goodbye to my friends?
You have 30 seconds.
Thank you, sir.
They're letting me go.
I have 4 packs of smokes stashed under a pot.
Half a can of beer under my bed.
Split it up.
Take good care
of my playmate collection.
1663, time to go!
Yes, sir!
Goodbye, Sir!
"I'm free as a bird"
Freeze!
What have I done?
You broke out of jail
This is a set up!
Of course it is!
If you work with me
you're free to go
and you'll get a reward of $2 millions.
What's the catch?
Nothing like that.
I want you to go to Japan
and help bring someone back.
Is he a cop?
Unfortunately, yes
He's a black sheep of the force.
He stole $100 millions worth of jewels
confiscated by our special task force
and sought shelter from the Scarecrow Club in Japan.
We can't go after him openly.
We need a criminal genius like you
to apprehend him.
Don't say that!
I'm a crook because I'm too fat to be a cop.
That's why they should change the eligibility.
Tell me...
Are you in or not?
I'm in! But I need help from my friends.
I don't care who you get.
Be at this address in 24 hours
and wait for my orders.
How about a deposit?
I knew it!
Give me your friends' names
Let's go, we can't afford that.
Ginseng!
5 cavities.
3 on the upper jaw and 2 down here.
US $3,000
Say that again!
US $5,000
I can't hear you.
US $7,000
I don't have that many cavities.
Give me another offer.
$10,000, that's all I have.
Fine!
Watch it!
I don't want to draw blood
Come in!
Millionaire Chan is here.
He's in a hurry.
Give me 2 minutes.
Must be my lucky day!
He is...
I know, Millionaire Chan
with a name like that he must be rich.
You're wrong...
Shut up! Get in there!
Don't hurt him.
When you two cheated on me
have you considered how hurt I'll be?
No!
Don't be mad, Mr. Chan.
Please come in, Mr. Chan.
Mr. Chan?
You know me?
It doesn't matter
as long as you have
a tooth problem.
Do you know her?
An old flame.
An old flame?
You have a thing going with her?
You mean a relationship?
Yes!
Of course!
Me too!
Like what?
She's my wife!
Really?
You're dead!
Wait! You got the wrong guy.
Is that him?
Yes!
Given the circumstance,
fight like a man.
I'm a man alright, but I don't know you.
I'll kill you!
Don't...
Freeze! Police!
Who are you?
I'm a thief.
Good! We'll arrest you.
3622
Yes?
Cuff him!
Yes, sir!
Let's go!
Don't move!
The patrol cops are on their way!
I'm Columbus, I discovered America.
You're walking a skinny dog.
It's a duck
I'm talking to the duck!
Bye!
"Introduction to ESP"
Concentrate...
Lay an egg...
He's crazy, what do you want with him?
He's not crazy.
Take a look around.
Free room and board
and no troubles.
He's over there!
Sandy!
What's happening?
A lot! That's why we need you.
Great! Let's have some fun!
I'll be rich.
Keep the dog
Is this a dog?
Let's play mahjong.
When?
I said when!
3 o'clock!
Round up the others!
Why aren't you working?
What?
Why aren't you working?
I can't hear you!
What's wrong with you?
I'm getting back at him for scolding me.
I'll only move this crate.
Lunch break!
Blockhead used to hang around you.
What is he doing here?
That was before his sister got married.
I can't wait to get rid of him.
Where's Blockhead?
He went out for lunch.
Hurry! We have to get back to work.
I win.
It was flying towards me...
Over there!
Hey!
I win.
I should win!
Hi, guys!
Quit your job and come with us.
I'm through! Keep playing.
What kind of card game is that?
African poker.
African poker?
What is that?
Very simple.
Each player is dealt 13 cards.
Whoever gets the fly to land on his cards will win.
Fastbuck, whatever you want us to do,
I won't do it with Blockhead around.
I don't work with retards.
He's our brother.
He maybe slow,
but he's loyal.
He's a royal pain.
Try tell him to go to hell.
Blockhead, I need a favor.
It can be dangerous.
Say no more, Boss
I'll do anything for you
except planning.
I'll even risk my life.
What if I tell you to go to hell?
You bet!
Don't read when you're driving!
Turn left...
Look out!
That was close!
What's wrong with you?
Sorry, wrong car.
Sandy, what's the matter with you?
Let's take care of the outsiders.
Fastbuck, you handle the truck driver.
I'll take care of the mini bus driver.
Hey, buddy!
What shall we do?
Don't worry, be unreasonable.
Intimidate them and they won't mess with us.
- Got it! - Let's go.
On this lovely sunny day
the streets are bustling
with cars flying by,
running up and down the streets.
You smashed my car, asshole!
Watch what you're saying!
Ginseng, didn't someone smash your car?
What happened to that kid?
He became a rug in my living room.
He was so patched up
my friends thought it was a mangy bear.
Rawhide, what about the guy
who dented your car?
Don't mention something I have eaten.
What about you, Fastbuck?
I'm more forgiving.
I put him in a jar
and sent the specimen to the university.
Blockhead, tell them your story.
After they smashed into me
I got out of the car and apologized.
I gave them all the money I had
and begged for their forgiveness.
You asshole!
I ran into
the exact same situation.
This is no time to bluff.
What's going on?
Are they bullying you?
Yes!
We're brothers!
I know right away
by your accent.
We could have slaughtered one another
but now we can settle this peacefully.
We're an extended family.
We're good friends, right?
Move the cars.
Don't hold up traffic!
Men from Chaozhou are united, right?
Yes!
They always fight for a brother, right?
Yes!
They team up against outsiders, right?
Yes!
As a man from Chaozhou,
will I be scared
to face a fellow brother?
Of course not!
But you're standing in my way.
Can you let us through?
You may go but they stay!
That's ridiculous! They're brothers too.
They learned other dialects since they came to Hong Kong.
They don't look it.
Appearances change!
Right...
Blockhead, show them.
Recite a poem in Chaozhou.
Let them hear it.
Go on!
Just say something.
7-Eleven.
What?
7-Eleven.
He's not speaking Chaozhou
I told you to practice,
but you won't listen!
What now?
Forget it, men from Chaozhou are mean!
Forget ESP.
You almost got us killed!
So what if I totaled a stolen car?
You're all cowards!
Especially Fastbuck!
He bragged about fighting 100 men...
Yet he cowered in front of a few dozen.
Me? What about you?
You and your "7-Eleven"
almost got us killed.
Settle down!
Stop passing the blame!
Fine!
Fine?
You imbecile!
7-Eleven!
It is 7-Eleven!
Forget it!
Just take us there!
Where?
There!
What kind of place is that?
I don't know, just go!
What is this?
I don't know!
I'm supposed to meet my contact.
Ginseng!
This house is older than you and me.
Definitely older than me.
But probably not older than you!
That's not the issue.
It better be safe.
I'm sure it is.
Falling from two stories won't kill you.
What if it's on fire?
Just be careful!
What if it's haunted?
Who knows if anyone died in there?
Are you finished?
Yes!
Move it!
Evil spirits go away...
The interior is nothing like the exterior.
What a big difference!
Not only that.
I like the color scheme.
It reminds me of a brothel.
That should suit you well.
Do me a favor!
What?
When you see me focus on something,
try to distract me!
No problem!
Sit down!
Here we are, Fastbuck.
Tell us what's going on.
I don't want to take guesses.
I hate to think.
It's because you can't.
Rawhide!
Did we fight back in the orphanage?
It wasn't a fight, I was beating you up!
You begged for mercy!
Men only fight over two things.
Women
and...
honor.
Go ahead and hit me!
I don't mind!
I'm not scare of you!
I'll hit you back!
Stop it! You'll get hurt!
Stay out of this!
I'm not backing off!
So what if I hit you?
Stop it!
I would have hit you back if you were someone else.
Do not hit me again!
What can you do about it?
I'm warning you...
What if I hit you again?
I dare you!
Make peace...
Why did you kick me?
You wanted me to distract you
when you try to stay focused.
I'm trying to help them!
I'll make your stomach explode!
Thank goodness it's him!
Let me...
What is it?
You!
The grapes gave me diarrhea.
How many toilets are there?
Five, including this one
Can you tell me
which side has a thicker grow of grass?
Your right side.
Never mind!
Feeling better?
Who are you?
I'm...
He's the sergeant who put me in jail.
I'm Chief Superintendent Walter Cho
of Special Duties Unit.
You set us up?
No! I didn't!
- Get up! - No!
It's not his fault! I blackmailed him.
That's his business! We're out of here!
Not so fast! Watch the news report.
About what?
I don't know.
...stir fry a while and the dish is done.
We bring you a special news report.
Earlier today, five men and a woman
barged in the Tsimshatsui branch of Harvest Bank.
They held the bank staff at gun point
and took off with $20 million.
Let's go live to our reporter on the scene.
Are there any
leads on the case?
Yes, these robbers
wore masks,
but our informant has revealed
their identities.
Rawhide!
Fastbuck, Sandy
Blockhead, Ginseng
and Baby.
That wraps up our news flash.
I have nothing to do with it, trust me!
Calm down!
I put on that show.
Now you're wanted by the law.
Only I know your whereabouts.
Relax, you're safe.
Nobody knows about this arrangement.
I came here alone
on this secret mission.
Really?
You have my word!
I have an idea!
If the Superintendent came here alone
and no one knows his whereabouts,
let's play a game.
Beat him up?
Yes!
- Help... - Stop it!
Freeze! Police!
Put your hands on your head!
Luckily I sold my soul to the Hong Kong Police,
or else I'm dead.
As long as you leave me alone,
they'll leave you alone!
Fine...
You may go!
Yes, sir!
Let's go!
You should know what's best for you.
It's obvious you have no choice.
I won't leave you out in the cold.
I'm sending my most capable assistant.
No thanks! We work alone!
He's right!
We don't work with cops!
There'll be no collaboration.
We only work against cops.
It's impossible!
I second that!
Miss!
Can I help you?
I'm the Superintendent's assistant.
I'll get that for you!
Please come in!
Thanks!
Sir!
I'm sorry you made this trip for nothing
We have our consensus
working with such a capable officer,
consider the assignment completed.
Welcome...
You're most welcome in here!
Please sit down!
Have a seat!
Excuse me!
I should be going.
Miss Woo will fill you in
about the details of the assignment.
Miss Woo!
See him out, guys!
Don't bother! Nobody would budge!
Miss Woo, a word with you!
Proceed as planned.
Yes, sir!
Good luck!
Goodbye, sir!
Bye!
My name is Barbara Woo.
I'm a police Inspector from team A
of the Special Duties Unit.
You may call me Inspector Woo.
But since we're on disguise,
you may call me Baby.
She's Baby!
I would have never guessed!
Miss Baby.
Who is it?
What is it?
Have you heard that noise?
No!
I saw a shadow in your room.
Must be in here!
Get out! I won't fall for that!
Take care!
Don't move! Robbery!
Robbery!
Shut up or I'll kill you
What now?
Don't move!
Tie them up!
Get up...
Don't resist or they'll kill us.
Don't move!
Don't worry, time flies by.
We'll cry for help when it's safe.
Your turn, Sandy!
Hurry!
What's going on?
We've been robbed.
What? It's impossible!
I'll untie you.
Sandy, stay with Baby.
I'll call the cops.
I'm here Baby! Don't worry!
Robbery!
How dare they come here?
What do you want?
What now, Boss?
Tie them up!
Tighter!
Search the place!
Nothing! Let's go!
Let's dance!
Dance my foot!
What happened?
Nothing!
We have been robbed!
Robbed?
Watch her, I'll call the cops.
That's not enough!
Where are you going?
Go change!
Hurry!
Don't move! Robbery!
Again?
What do you want?
We're after money! Get over there!
How dare you fight us!
You're too heavy, I can't breathe!
No monkey business, fat guy!
- I know. - It's alright, let's go!
Don't be scared!
Thanks!
Help is on the way!
What happened?
Robbery!
Robbery?
Stay with her, I'll call the cops!
Fine!
Your turn!
Are you alright?
Don't move! Robbery!
Oh my God!
What now, Boss?
Tie her up!
Don't move!
It's finally my turn!
What happened, Blockhead?
Nothing! Run along, don't mind me.
You must have been robbed!
Poor thing, let me untie you.
What a pain!
It's alright, don't worry!
- Thanks! - It's alright!
Let's call the cops.
You imbecile! Who'll protect her?
Get out!
Move it!
You should have yelled for help.
I could have come to your rescue
and you'll fine.
I really care about you!
Don't move! Robbery!
Again?
Yes, again!
Do we tie them up, Boss?
When I came in
I realized the guy is too fat.
I brought extra rope.
Tie them up separately.
Separately?
What do you think?
Great!
Forget it!
You were all tied together.
Why must you keep us apart?
It's not fair!
Blockhead, you bastard!
I knew you're a traitor!
I'm not Blockhead!
You can hide under that mask!
It's not my fault! Nothing happened!
Sorry, we were just kidding!
But that's enough!
Get out! All of you!
Get out!
What a bunch of assholes!
It's late, let's go to bed!
Get the hell out!
Welcome...
It's late, let's go to bed!
Sorry!
Just kidding!
Let's go!
Since we're dressed up like this
do we get to fly a real airplane?
No, but you can jerk off.
How?
Ask Baby.
Let's go!
Have you learned your lesson?
Like that?
How dare you hit me!
Stop fooling around, Blockhead!
Get in!
Forget it!
Wait! I'll go check in.
Wait here, I'm going to the toilet.
I'll get some water.
I'll check out the chicks.
Wait here!
Wait! I'll go get something.
Watch where you're going!
You should get out of my way!
My eyes were busy.
What are you looking at?
That Japanese girl is cute.
How do you know she's Japanese?
Can you tell watercress from carrots?
Thanks!
What are you doing?
I dropped a 100-yen coin outside.
Why are you looking in here?
It's too dark, I can't see out there.
It's brighter in here!
You'll be here till dawn, you idiot!
You'll never find it.
Here! It's a 500-yen coin!
That's mine!
Let's go up!
Let's go!
This is nice!
Who gets this suite?
Definitely not you!
I come prepared.
One for each of you.
This hotel is fully booked.
I have to sleep here too.
Great!
We'll share this room?
Sleep anywhere you want
because I'm taking the bedroom.
Let me help you!
There are two beds!
So?
Don't let it go to waste.
Right!
One of you can take that bed!
Don't make a fool of yourself!
Go out!
Excuse us,
we need to discuss this!
It won't take long!
Get out!
We grew up together.
I'm the oldest.
My days are numbered.
Have pity on me.
Let me have the bed.
Be a good example, Blockhead! Say it!
No way!
What?
He said no!
Say that again!
No way!
I give in to you every time.
I'm old enough to get married.
I won't help you chase women.
Let's settle it the old way.
Fine!
"I passed by your door"
"You poured water from the bucket"
"and got my shoes wet"
"Everyone is laughing"
"You said nothing to me"
"and stared at me with smiling eyes"
"Loo la..."
What's so funny?
You! You acted like you could read Japanese.
Can you?
I can't stand it!
I have to rape her!
Wait!
How can you say that?
What else?
Gang rape!
Good idea!
Let's go!
You can't do that!
Stay out of this!
Step away!
Baby, they want to rape you!
How can you harbor such thoughts?
You're sick!
How could you even think of it!
I regret the day I met you.
You're despicable!
I'm sorry I kicked you!
It's just a misunderstanding!
I don't blame you!
But it hurts here!
Close your eyes!
Then I can't see you.
You can see me afterwards.
I...
Quiet!
Asshole!
You're sleeping on the floor, asshole!
Give me one of the mattresses!
Can't you move it?
Do you know him?
Muscles?
He's here.
Fastbuck...
Say no more! I won't do it!
He's bad news!
Count me out!
Put aside your personal grudge for a good cause.
I'm not backing out,
but I can't work with him
We stole sweet potatoes when we were kids.
He fingered me when he got caught.
Later I helped him with a poker game.
I dealt him the good hands.
He didn't share his winnings with me.
When I shared with him
my elaborate plan
to rob an underground casino,
he had me busted because he was a cop.
I don't trust him!
Look at me!
The eyes is the window to your soul.
Can you see my soul?
I'm not sure.
Come closer!
Well?
I can only see myself.
That's what is in my heart.
You're my hero!
But I haven't seen you do
anything heroic.
I will.
That's so exciting!
To see a man like you
do something heroic.
The never-yielding Fastbuck!
Right here.
Don't stop me from praising you...
You must charge ahead.
Let's put the baddies behind bars.
Let's go!
That was too powerful!
Come with me!
Here!
Muscles...
Don't move, Fatso!
What are you doing here?
I have a blind date.
Where is Muscles?
That's what I want to know!
Don't let them get away!
Just us?
And me!
You're bad news!
That's him! Kill them!
Here!
Long time no see, Fastbuck! How are you?
I was fine until now.
Thanks for coming!
If I knew it was you...
Let's put the past behind us!
We're on an important mission.
Tie them up!
Help yourself to this $20 million yen.
How generous of you! No thanks!
This is the bait!
Thanks.
Did you find the adulterers?
No! I even checked the toilet.
Fastbuck is always a woman chaser.
Let's eat.
Milk, ham, and fried eggs.
He doesn't have a clue.
Right!
Milk, ok?
Ham...smoke...got that?
Sizzle...
Me? Coffee.
Coffee, spaghetti bolognese
Meat...
Meat sauce and pasta
Spaghetti bolognese
Club sandwich
What is it in English...
Club sandwich
Bread, butter
Chicken, ham
Bread, butter
Chicken, eggs
Lettuce, tomatoes, I can't do the rest!
More bread!
Club sandwich
Understand?
I want...
You must know how to order.
You can't order what we're having.
Grapefruit juice.
Grapefruit juice?
Grapefruit...juice...
...and a sausage
Sausage?
How do you illustrate that?
You know sausage in Japanese?
No, I showed him
Good, club sandwich!
The owner of these underground casinos
is the head of the Scarecrow Club.
Act like you're a parvenu
before they'll take the bait.
I may not show up in time to save you.
Play by ear.
Please come in!
What's your pleasure?
You only have one game!
We have no choice.
Call me if you need anything.
Alright...
Thanks
Please sit down!
Good luck!
Rawhide, Ginseng, Fastbuck,
Sandy, and Blockhead.
Do you know how to play?
Don't call
us that!
There's a hole!
What is it?
2 and 3, odd.
If it's that easy, they'll go bust!
A big spender!
It's nothing!
Look!
Place your bets!
Hurry! Spend the money.
You can't bring it back to Hong Kong.
What should it be?
You won't believe it, odd again.
I believe you!
3 and 6, odd again!
Place your bets!
Wait!
I'll pay back the money you lost.
It's money in the bank anyway!
Forget about scoring women.
You can open a farm with this money.
Boss?
We have 6 people from Hong Kong.
Judging from their names and appearances,
they're the robbers on the run.
What should I do?
Cops!
This way please, friends from Hong Kong.
Cheers!
Hats off to what you did in Hong Kong.
You have my respect.
The Scarecrow Club needs
talents like yourselves.
Let's have a blast.
How about another dance?
No thanks!
I know now.
Japanese geisha houses are like bars in Hong Kong
I thought they'll drink,
laugh and bathe with us.
You idiot! This is Japan!
No matter what you say, forget it!
I understand.
I have pretty ladies for you.
They're alright!
Pretty!
Matsumoto-san
Just give them food and wine.
They already have girlfriends.
They probably don't want them
to know about their flings.
Suit yourselves.
Wait!
I'm sure they don't mind
if we have a little bit of fun.
We should go with the flow.
I can be true to her
even if I'm with someone else.
You should enjoy yourselves.
Don't disappoint the ladies.
I need company.
Do whatever you want!
Boys will be boys!
Have a good time! Excuse me!
Come here!
Well?
I don't know the others,
but I'm sure the fat one
worked with Muscles.
Don't worry!
Sit over here, Blockhead
Why?
I don't have to explain! Get over here!
Get up!
I'm afraid one of you
must leave now.
In order to become our member
you must first fulfill your obligation.
Who'll go get the money?
This is too important.
I'm too careless.
I'll screw up.
I'm crazy.
Brothers
I'm sure you won't send a moron
to do something so important.
I'll go! I hid the money anyway.
Ma Chiu, give him a ride.
Yes, sir
Look after yourself, Baby.
I've been doing that all along.
Run along Fastbuck!
Hurry!
Don't screw up!
Hurry back!
Have fun!
- Fastbuck! - Fastbuck!
Figure it out yourself!
Muscles!
341617
Hello?
Fastbuck?
Who's this?
It's Muscles! How did it go?
They held the others hostage.
I came back to get the ransom.
We'll bust their headquarters.
No problem! What now?
I'll get you the money.
Hurry!
This is not funny!
I don't know if it's you.
This is $20 million?
No, this is $10 million.
But you promised me $20 million.
They only want half, you don't need the rest.
Where are you taking the money?
The amusement park.
Someone will contact me
I knew it!
I just didn't know where in the park.
Take this lighter.
Flick it on and I'll get the signal.
Let me know as soon as you step inside.
I'll try.
Fastbuck
Don't play with it! Be careful!
Stop staring, it's Muscles.
You don't scare me!
What's with the lanterns?
Big ones, round ones...
That was scary!
It's a fake.
Come on!
You're serious!
Let me take this off first!
Where are my friends?
We checked
the robbery and the money.
Don't tell me...
They're fake!
We have gadgets like this.
Kenji
Yes?
Take this lighter to Mount Fuji.
Light up some smokes, the more the better.
Bring some matches, it's out of gas.
Really?
You idiot! You flick it on,
the cops will know we're here.
Get out!
Get up to the top! If you get caught,
jump into the volcano.
Don't bother coming back.
Yes, Boss.
Lock him up.
Yes, Boss.
Clean this up!
Yes, Boss.
There you are!
We're having such a good time!
Baby!
Where's the other agent?
Speak up or I'll hit you.
It's not my fault!
You're incredible, Muscles.
Pass out...
Don't hit me!
I said don't hit me!
You must protect me.
Don't worry!
You'll be fine!
What are you doing?
Get up, Shorty!
Are you alright?
I'm fine! And you?
I'm fine!
He lured us here with the women
and locked us up.
We must fix him!
Let's...
Move!
Help!
How much?
Just a bit!
After him.
Ricky!
Open the door!
I'll take care of her.
She's awesome!
This is not a job to die for, pal.
I want a promotion, alright?
I lose!
Over there!
This place is crawling with cops, let's go!
So? We're with the cops!
That's right!
Thanks, Fastbuck!
I never want to see you again.
Do you need a ride?
No! We won't like cop cars either.
Grow up and behave!
"I passed by your door"
"You splashed water from the bucket"
"and got my shoes wet"
"Everyone is laughing"
"You said nothing to me"
"and stared at me with smiling eyes"
"Loo la..."